Augmented Free Stuff

If you haven't heard of Augmented reality yet then you must not work in the media. It is a new way of overlaying virtual reality on reality. In less bullshit terms: imagine having your camera on and because of GPS it knows where you are in the world and because of your compass it know which way you are facing, therefore it knows what you are looking at. So you are pointing your camera at the Tate Modern, and on your screen will appear information about what exhibition is on and you can scroll through some examples of the art and an overview of the artist, pretty neat right? (for a better explanation with video click here, and now there is some even cooler shit).

So if you take Freecycle (the Ebay of the poor mans world) and mix it up with a bit of iPhone APPage and some Augment Reality, hey presto, you can be ambling down the street, whip out your phone and see all the free stuff that people are just giving away. You never know, you could be playing Golden Eye and Mario Cart on your brand new N64 before the day is done.

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If anyone else has any great, medium or crap ideas then send them to reuben_leon@hotmail.co.uk and Ill whack them up.

dEATh

It was a lovely London evening (a concept that we will have to forget about until next year now) and I decided to take a break from my cycle home in Battersea Park to have a quite self reflection time, as you do. It was all going well, the sun was beaming off my face and I was in mid flow of self appraising thoughts when the film of water on the top of my water bottle began to ripple, then the bench began to shake, it was like I was sat in that scene from Jurassic Park, the bit where they are in the car and the boy character has those cool night vision goggles that we all wanted for Christmas that year, and then that guy gets eaten while he was on the toilet haha. Luckily I didn't get eaten, although the man that staggered his way past me probably would have done if he'd seen me. His feet crashing into the ground with each step of his 'run', shaking the ground under foot. Fair play to him though, at least he was giving it his best shot, now all he needed to do was stop eating so much before he digs himself an early grave. Out of nowhere it flew into my head that the word 'Death' has the word 'Eat' slap bang in the middle of it, so I abandoned my advertising roots for a second and did this little piece of design, and I apologise to all the macarupurers out there who could have done a much better job.

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If anyone else has any great, medium or crap ideas then send them to reuben_leon@hotmail.co.uk and Ill whack them up.

The Dream

Everyone has had that dream to be on the open road, free from the world, just traveling from town to town on a Harley Davidson motor bike, nothing but the open road ahead of you, total freedom.

Well while drying my hands in the toilet the other day, I realised you could spin the blower around. My hair began to blow and I closed my eyes, making the low grumbling sound of a motor bike engine with my mouth, and for a few seconds it almost felt like I was there, that was until one of my co-workers walked in and asked me what the fuck I was doing. One bit of advice before I go, don't try and dry your balls in the new Dyson hand dryers.

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If anyone else has any great, medium or crap ideas then send them to reuben_leon@hotmail.co.uk and Ill whack them up.

Obvious

While on my way home last week carrying my trusty crate of beer (slab if you're an Aussie) ready for a lovely afternoon in the sun, beer to right of me, meat sizzling on the BBQ to the left, toilet not too far away and extra flimsy processed cheese for good measure, I had a little mishap.

In Morrison's there was one of those crazy offers on, buy one crate get another one half price! So the obvious choice was to get both. I was pretty sure that my extremely massive and masculine guns were not going to let me down on my trek home, but the awkward crate stacking and my clumsy size small feet were more of a challenge.

As I was falling, my instinct was to save the beer, but it was too late. Before I even hit the ground I could here the devastating sound of metal crashing against concrete, and the inevitable spray spilling in a wild frenzy from each can. The aftermath could only be described as a massacre. MEDIC!! I shouted... Anybody!! but no one came, and as a lay there among the devastation, beer splattering across my lips, I could see in the distance the culprit... the flimsy weak crates with no damn handles. I resented the people involved in this beer genocide, designers, manufactures, distributes anyone! and vowed to take revenge by the neck and punish all that were involved for what they had done ... to be continued


P.S. Look even wine boxes (goon boxes in Australian) have got the right idea. I think I may have to become a wine box connoisseur from now on.

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If anyone else has any great, medium or crap ideas then send them to reuben_leon@hotmail.co.uk and Ill whack them up.

Read and Move

If you're one of those sorry souls that have to get the tube to work everyday, then firstly... get a bike, and secondly you must know how much time this gives you for some extra reading.

You are either one of the 1.7 million speed readers that scan through the Metro at top speed everyday, for their daily hit of sport and celebrity gossip (I'd pay the 10p for the sun if I were you, at least you get boobs then), or you are one of the 'intellectuals', kicking back to a bit of Harry Potter. But what happens when Harry kills Lord Voldermort and returns the Philosophers Stone, what then... well with the new book exchange boxes, you could exchange it for a new one, you never know you might get the 'Chamber of secrets' if you're really lucky.

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If anyone else has any great, medium or crap ideas then send them to reuben_leon@hotmail.co.uk and Ill whack them up.

Paul Nowikowski

Imagine you're Paul Nowikowski (the poor unsuspecting art director that used to use my computer) and when he was working at the agency he wanted logging into programs, such as his Barclays fantasy football, to be as easy as possible. So instead of typing in his details each time he just clicked on the 'remember my user name and password' button. Bad mistake Paul, because now when you want to swap Rooney for Drogba, i'll be there to make sure it's Harewood instead hahahahaha. I'm only joking Paul, I know a man should never touch another mans fantasy football team.

So instead, to help poor Paul, someone needs to invent a button, either built into the keyboard or downloadable on to your desktop, to log people out of their accounts permanently when we've finished using them. I'm talking fantasy football accounts, Hotmail, Google mail, Facebook, Bebo (for all the teenagers), the whole shh-bang. We've all been on the receiving end of a good Facebook raping enough times already.



This is another button I desperately need on my keyboard.

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If anyone else has any great, medium or crap ideas then send them to reuben_leon@hotmail.co.uk and Ill whack them up.